Tonight I had one of those “divorce” experiences that must be common but that no body ever talks about.
The kids have been with their daddy these past several days (Memorial Day Weekend) and I was super missing them and just wanted to touch their blond heads with my lips and breath them in for a minute… no harm no foul right?
I had this tsunami of emotion wash over me that was so massive I felt like I was drowning for a moment.
There they were, happy faces, love and big mommy hugs and MAN, I miss my whole family.
I miss the times that were so few to begin with … and honestly, the rest are the visions and dreams of our family I created that took root in the womb of my own mind and grew right along with them. It’s ok to be sad still right? I wish for the day when I am no longer so saddened by the turn of events in my life, and can choose more naturally and quickly the optimism that is never too far behind the grief…
like the rainbow after the rainstorm.
(Thank you Mr. Goodbar for just holding me and letting me cry… you are my rainbow)